WELP there it is, I dropped the ball once again on posting for a solid 13 days. I’m so good at this. So much talent and dedication in my pursuit for preserving memories.
I’m going to be REAL real for one second and then I’ll give a brief rundown on what has been going on in m’life. There is pretty much a direct correlation between the times when I don’t write anything and the times when I am really not feeling Remote Year or myself or both. This is undoubtedly an amazing experience but it is 1000% best-suited for extroverts or even introverts with clean bills of mental health. For those of us who experience anxiety and/or depression, especially without access to people to talk to (professionally) or some kind of medication (if that’s your jam), this year can be prettyyy hellish. It can be completely draining and exhausting because sometimes all you want is just to be alone and sit on your butt but then you feel guilty for not being social, and you see people doing fun things together and on one hand you want to do those things too but on the other you just know that it would put you over the edge and you might actually die. Or maybe not DIE I guess, but just not be happy at all, and so you don’t go.
Having a go-to thing to do that you know will ground you in every city is absolutely fucking crucial. For me, for the first 7 months more or less, that has been going to a gym or spin studio and working out. But this is Belgrade, and the gyms have been compared to Serbian basements (a la Cordoba, if you will), and people don’t really ride real bikes, much less stationary bikes in a group setting. So it’s been a major test for me to find out how to keep moving because it truly does impact my entire experience and well-being, both physically and mentally. “Go for a run!” Shut up. Sorry, but it’s 100 degrees here every day and running has never been my favorite (hence, bikes). I’m lucky if I can stomach a 20 minute run at 7am. So, this is a work in progress and a major #growthzone moment.
Anyway, when I don’t post for almost two weeks it’s because my experience feels uninteresting enough that I don’t feel like I have anything to say. Or I’m bitter for being away from the ones and things I love. These things happen, and these moments pass, and fortunately, that’s where I’m at now.
Since I last posted:
- I arrived in Belgrade! It’s an interesting city with a buttload of fascinating and devastating history. It’s not super pretty or modern, but you wouldn’t be either if you’d been involved in some kind of war for most of your existence.
- I have spent a LOT of time at the pool. Not much to do here, not much motivation to do much else when it’s 100 degrees on the reg and sitting in your apartment’s AC is just too sad.
- My sister and my boyfriend attended the same wedding (she photographed, he danced) and I felt the strongest FOMO I’ve felt all year.
- I went kayaking on the Danube River.
- I spent a day on a houseboat kind of thing on the Sava River, and it was the first really good day I had had in over a week. It was perfect and exactly what I needed.
- I surprised Chris with a couple of things because he ran his first half marathon race and it was so much fun because again, I live to scheme with good intentions.
- I have consumed a lot of feta cheese and I regret nothing.
Here’s to more good days and more regular posts. Живели!